Season 4: Life After Death
by OCTV1
Summary: Picking up immediately after season three ended, with Ryan holding Marissa's body, this story deals with the emotional fallout of Marissa's death as everyone tries to deal with the tragedy.
1. Chapter 1

"Marissa," he shook her cold body. "Marissa, wake up." Ryan looked at the darkness around him. The car was still burning in the distance and the flames were getting stronger. His focus turned back to Marissa. Why wasn't she moving? Had she fallen asleep? "Marissa, it's gonna be okay. Just wake up." The fear in his eyes continued to grow stronger and the tears started to fall as the whole world around him slowly turned into his first night in Newport.

"Who are you?" she asked him as she stood at the end of the driveway, alone.

Ryan looked at her, blown away by her beauty. Who was she? "Whoever you want me to be."

The memory quickly disappeared and the reality sank right back in. Her body still wasn't moving. Ryan gently put his ear against her chest, but heard nothing. He crawled over to the side of her bleeding head and plugged her nose. Ryan leaned over and breathed into her, but nothing happened. Again. Nothing. Again. Nothing. Why wasn't she moving? This wasn't happening. Ryan's eyes moved up down her body, examining every inch of her, when her left hand started to move. Ryan jumped at first, before a smile appeared across his face. She was going to be okay. He looked back up at her eyes. "Marissa, wake up." He started to shake her body, but nothing happened. Ryan focused on her left hand once again, and soon realized the movement was nothing but a small body twitch. She wasn't going to be okay.

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Julie slowly poured the wine into her glass before tipping it back and taking a sip. She sighed as she pulled out a chair and sat down. After a moment, Neil entered the kitchen and saw her sitting, looking glum. "Julie?"

Julie turned her head to face Neil. "Hi," she weakly smiled.

Neil approached her and pulled out a chair for himself. "Are you okay?" he sat down.

"I will be," Julie nodded. "It's just a strange feeling to finally let Marissa go after eighteen years."

"At least she's not going to be alone," Neil tried to comfort her. "She'll be with her father. She'll be safe."

"I know," Julie looked down. "I'm going to really miss her. Practically everything I've done in the past ten years has been for her. The past three have been a bit of a rollercoaster ride."

"I know the two of you haven't always had the cleanest relationship, but I think you should be proud Julie," Neil took her hand. "She's a great young lady."

Julie looked up at him with a smile. "You know, even though she's left, I think I'm in as happy of a place as I could be. I've always wondered whether I've made the right decisions concerning her, whether I've been a good mom or not. And to be honest, I often think I haven't. But right now, the way things have turned out for Marissa and me, I'm really pleased.

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Ryan reached into his pocket, trying to find his cell phone. Maybe someone could get here in time. Maybe she could still be saved. He hands dug deep into all of his pockets, but nothing could be found. Ryan looked over at the burning car and immediately got up. He sprinted towards it and dropped to his knees once he was there. The heat from the fire was intense, but he didn't care. Ryan tried to look inside, but the fire was too distracting. Finally, Ryan saw something shining by the windshield. He reached in and grabbed his cell phone. Once he had moved away from the burning vehicle, he flipped open the phone. "Shit!" he yelled and threw his phone towards the fire. The screen had been cracked from the crash and the buttons weren't working, making the phone useless.

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"Did we just do it in a box?" Summer asked as she crawled out of the large cardboard box.

"I think we did," Seth laughed as he jumped on his bed. "I guess I can cross that off my list of things-to-do."

"Ew, you wrote sex-in-a-box on your list of things-to-do?" Summer lay down beside him.

"Well, if I had a list, I probably would," Seth smiled.

Summer reached over to Seth's bed-side table and grabbed Captain Oats. "Sorry you had to witness that Captain Oats."

"Don't worry about him," Seth said. "He's used to a solo show, so he probably liked that you were here to mix it up."

"Ew, Cohen!"

"So we have approximately two months together before you leave," Seth turned his head to face her.

Summer looked over at him. "And then before we know it we'll have Thanksgiving, and then Christmas, and then you'll be joining me in Rhode Island."

"For once, the future actually looks promising," Seth smiled as he took Summer's hand.

"Except for the fact that we won't see Coop for a whole year," Summer complained. "Honestly, I have no clue how she's going to survive on a boat for that long. She better hook up with some cute sailors."

"I wonder what that means for her and Ryan," Seth thought aloud. "If they don't see each other for a year, do you think they'll ever get back together?"

"I dunno," Summer said. "They clearly love each other, but they're way too dysfunctional together.

"Ryan should be getting back from driving her soon, so we may need to do some cheering up."

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Ryan crawled back to Marissa's body and sat beside her. What was there to do now? Nothing was in walking distance. And even if he did decide to walk, what would he do with her? He couldn't just leave her on the road. Eventually a car would come, he thought. Someone would come save them and everything would be okay. Everything. Ryan picked up Marissa's body and moved her to the side of the road. He gently lay her back down on the pavement and then slowly lowered himself beside her. Ryan lay down and took her hand in his as he slowly drifted in and out of sleep.

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	2. Chapter 2

'Hey, it's Ryan. Leave me a message,' Seth listened into the phone and then hung up. "No answer."

"Where could he be?" Summer wondered as she sat on Seth's bed.

"I have no clue, but they left for the airport over four hours ago. He should've been back a while ago," Seth was worried.

"Maybe he was upset and he went somewhere to be alone?" Summer suggested. "I wouldn't be surprised if he was at Marissa's lifeguard tower."

Seth thought about it for a moment before shaking his head. "I don't know. He would've called and told me he wasn't coming home yet."   
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Kirsten pulled the covers over her and grabbed a book off the bed-side table. She opened it to the page where she left off and began reading, but was interrupted when Sandy walked out of the bathroom. "I hope you don't plan on reading."

Kirsten looked up at her husband and smiled. "And why is that?"

"Well," Sandy walked toward the bed. "I was thinking maybe we could spend some time together," he jumped on.

Kirsten closed her book and put it back on the table. "You're a naughty man Sandy Cohen." 

Sandy moved on top of her and began kissing her when they heard a knock on their bedroom door. Kirsten immediately pushed Sandy off her and got up.

"Mom? Dad?" Seth called from outside. 

Kirsten looked over at the clock. 12:13. She quickly walked to the door and opened it. She was surprised to see Summer standing behind Seth. "Seth, Summer. Is everything alright?"

"I don't know," Seth told his mom as Sandy walked up behind her. "Ryan isn't back yet from driving Marissa to the airport and he isn't answering his phone."   
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"Hey bitch," Kaitlin said into the phone as she collapsed on her new bed.

"Kaitlin? Could that really be you?" Hadley asked as she looked over at the empty half of her room that Kaitlin used to occupy.

"Of course it's me," Kaitlin laughed. "I figured it was time to check in over there, see how you're doing? Is everything cool?"

"Totally," Hadley responded. "I miss you, but you're a bitch, so I'll get over it."

Kaitlin laughed at her best friend. "Right back at ya."

"So how's the new big mansion?" Hadley wondered. "Has Marissa moved out yet?"

"Yup. I'm lying in her extremely comfortable bed, which now belongs to me."

"Lucky bitch," Hadley smiled.

"And with Marissa out of the house, I don't have to worry about being ignored anymore," Kaitlin told her. "I'm telling you bitch, for once, things are looking pretty good."   
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"He's still not picking up," Sandy put the kitchen phone down. "I don't understand where he could be."

"I'm telling you," Summer began. "Marissa's tower of solitude." 

"Maybe he doesn't want us to go find him right now," Seth spoke up. "I mean, the girl he's loved for the past three years just walked out of his life for a year. He's probably feeling pretty down."

"Has anyone even checked the pool house?" Kirsten asked.

Summer nodded. "Seth and I already looked out there."

"Maybe Marissa's flight was delayed so he's keeping her company," Seth suggested.

"It's getting a little late for that," Sandy shook his head. "Besides, Ryan would've called. He's usually pretty good about that."

"Let's just keep waiting," Kirsten's voice remained calm. "If he doesn't return in a couple hours, we'll call the police."   
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Ryan's eyes slowly began to open as he saw blue and red lights surrounding him. Two men were leaned over him, yelling at people around them as a third man quickly wheeled a stretched over to him. 

"Son," one man spoke. "Can you hear me?"

Ryan closed his eyes tightly before opening them again. He moaned as he was lifted up onto the stretcher and wheeled towards an ambulance. His eyes drifted a few meters away but stopped when he spotted Marissa. Her body was horizontal on the stretcher as a blanket was pulled over her face. Good, Ryan thought to himself. The paramedics were here, and everything was going to be okay. Marissa was going to be okay. Ryan got dizzier and dizzier as he was placed in the ambulance before everything went black.   
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Julie shot up in her bed when she heard the phone ringing. She looked over at the clock. 3:17. Neil slowly woke up beside her and rubbed his eyes. She quickly reached over and grabbed the phone. "Hello?" she answered, barely awake.

"Mrs. Cooper, mother of Marissa Cooper?" a man asked on the other end.

Julie paused, suddenly worried. "Yes, this is her. Is everything okay?" 

"I'm afraid not ma'am," the man continued. "Your daughter was in an accident."

Julie instantly froze. "Oh my god."

Neil sat up in the bed. "What is it?" he whispered.

"She's currently at the Civic Hospital," the man said.

"I'll be right there," Julie said immediately before throwing down the phone and jumping out of bed. "Marissa's been in an accident. I'm going to the hospital now."

"Oh god," Neil looked down. "Alright, take the beamer. I'll go wake Summer and we'll meet you there."

Julie nodded as she bolted out the room. Every fear she had ever had was running through her mind as she ran out the front door and towards the car. The calmness of the night made her even more uncomfortable.   
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Kirsten, Sandy, Seth and Summer sat in the Cohens living room, all looking like they were about to fall asleep. Kirsten looked at her watch. "It's almost 3:30. This isn't right. I'm going to call the police," she stood up and walked towards the kitchen. Sandy got up and followed her.

Seth looked over at Summer. "Do you think he's okay?"

"I hope so," Summer took his hand and held it tightly.

Kirsten reached for the kitchen phone just as it began to ring, causing her to jump. "Hello?" 

"Kirsten?" Neil asked on the other end. "It's Neil Roberts."

"Hi Neil," Kirsten nodded.

Summer looked over at Seth, realizing that her dad didn't know where she was. "Oh my god, I'm going to be in so much trouble."

"Is Summer over there?" Neil asked. "I just went into her room to wake her and found no one."

"Yeah, she is," Kirsten began. "Sorry we didn't have her call, we've been a little distracted. Ryan hasn't come home yet."

Neil paused and looked down before continuing. "Julie and I just got a call from the hospital. Marissa was in an accident. It must've been on the way to the airport."

"Oh my god," Kirsten paused. What if Ryan or Marissa were hurt? "We'll drive to the hospital now." 

"Okay, I'll see you there."

Kirsten hung up the phone and turned to Sandy, Seth and Summer. "Ryan and Marissa were in an accident."

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"What's taking so long? This shouldn't be taking so long," Julie panicked as she paced the hospital lobby.

"Julie, calm down," Kirsten assured her. "There's nothing we can do but wait."

"Don't tell me to calm down Kiki," Julie snapped at her. "My daughter is somewhere in the hospital in pain, and they won't let me see her." 

Summer looked at Seth. He was trying to stay awake, but his eyes kept closing. She took his hand in hers, and squeezed tightly. "Do you think they're going to be okay?"

Seth opened his eyes widely and looked over at Summer. "I really don't know. I hope so."

"They have to be okay," Summer told herself. "They have to be okay."

Sandy looked down at his watch. 4:17. He looked over at Kirsten and noticed that she was trembling. "Hey," Sandy put his arm around her.

"Hi," Kirsten looked up at him. "What are we going to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean," Kirsten continued. "If something has happened to Ryan, what are we going to do? I don't even know how Seth would deal with it."

"Let's not talk about that," Sandy insisted. "Right now, all we can do it wait. We can't make any assumptions. For all we know they're both going to walk into this lobby with a couple bruises and a dizzy head." 

Julie froze when she saw a doctor walking down the hall towards them. "Oh my god."

Kirsten and Sandy both looked up when they heard Julie and also spotted the doctor. "Guys," Kirsten called Seth and Summer.

Seth and Summer both looked at each other, clearly very nervous.

The doctor walked through the glass doors that separated him from everyone else, and entered the lobby. "Are you the families of Marissa Cooper and Ryan Atwood?"

"Yes, Julie Cooper," Julie spoke immediately, as everyone else nodded.

"Is everything okay?" Summer asked.

The doctor looked down at the clipboard in his hands. "Ryan Atwood has got some bruises and some scratches, but he's fine. He's sleeping right now, and should probably get the rest, so you can visit him in a few hours once he's awake."

Kirsten and Sandy both let out sighs of relief as they hugged each other. 

"What about my daughter?" Julie asked. "You didn't mention her."

The doctor looked down to the ground and then back up at Julie. He hated this part of his job. "Mrs. Cooper, could you please come with me for a moment?"

"Why?" Julie asked as she walked towards him. "What's going on?"

The doctor walked back through the glass doors and stopped in the hallway with Julie.

"I'm sorry, I didn't want to have to tell you in front of everyone," he gently told her.

Julie's hands started to tremble as her eyes filled with water. "Tell me what? No, don't say it," she shook her head.

"I'm really sorry," he looked down. "Marissa didn't make it." 

"No!" Julie screamed as she collapsed and hit the ground hard. She didn't even try to contain herself. She just let the tears stream down her face as she sobbed onto the floor.

"Oh god," Summer looked through the glass doors and watched Julie fall to the ground in tears. Summer's eyes filled with tears as she realized what that meant. She grabbed Seth immediately and buried her face in his chest, not wanting everyone to see her cry.

Seth looked up and saw what Summer had been looking at. Julie was lying on the ground in hysterics, shaking uncontrollably. "Oh my god." 

Sandy, Kirsten and Neil all looked through the doors and saw Julie. Neil ran through the doors and dropped to Julie's side. "Julie."

"Get away from me!" she screamed at him. "Everybody, just get away from me!"

Neil looked up at the doctor. He stood up and pulled the doctor away from Julie. "Is she gone?"

The doctor nodded. "I'm really sorry." 

"Jesus," Neil put his hand on his forehead. "Thank you for your help," he turned around and walked back into the lobby. 

Sandy and Kirsten stared at him as they held each other tightly, afraid of what he was about to tell them.

Summer slowly looked up to see her father.

"Marissa didn't make it," he informed them.

Summer immediately went right back into Seth's chest and continued to cry.

Seth stood there, frozen, unsure of what to do. Had he really just heard what he thought he had? Marissa Cooper, the girl who lived next door for most of his life, was dead.

"Dear God," Kirsten hugged Sandy. 

Julie continued to roll on the ground as Marissa's entire life flashed before her eyes. Her first birthday: Marissa couldn't blow out her candles so Julie did it for her. Her first day of school: Marissa was terrified and thought everyone would hate her, but Julie insisted everything would be okay. That very same day, Marissa came home talking about her new best friend, Summer Roberts. Her first bee-sting: Marissa ran into the kitchen crying because the bee stung her right on the tongue. High school: Marissa started to change and develop, as her relationship with Julie started to crumble. Her OD in Mexico, Julie's relationship with Luke, her brief lesbian fling. As Julie thought back, she realized how much Marissa had done in her life. And now, everything Marissa had ever done, was for nothing. She was gone. Dead. And sooner or later, as people began to adjust to life with Marissa, she would be forgotten. But not to Julie. Julie would never forget her. Marissa was her life, and for Julie Cooper, nothing would ever be the same.


	3. Chapter 3

Seth opened his eyes and looked over at the clock on his bed-side table. 7:45 A.M. He closed his eyes tightly before opening them again. His fingers slowly moved towards his eyes and he rubbed them hard. A million thoughts were running through his head, and he was trying to sort reality from the dreams he had while sleeping. Although he wished more than anything that last night's events hadn't been real, he knew they were. It just hadn't sunk in yet, but sooner or later, he knew it would hit him. Marissa was dead. Right now, however, his main priority was making sure Ryan was okay. Seth yawned, exhausted from the small amount of sleep he had received, as he got out of bed and walked out of his bedroom. Seth quickly made his way down the hall to his parents' room, and gentle opened the door, peering in. He saw that both his parents were fast asleep, so he entered the room. 

Kirsten opened her eyes when she heard her name being whispered. The first image she saw was Seth leaning over her, gently pushing her arm to wake her up. "Hi sweetie."

"Do you think we could go to the hospital? Ryan's probably going to be awake soon."

Kirsten looked over at the clock and then gave Seth a smile. "Sure, we can. Let me just go get dressed," she got out of bed. "Wake your father," Kirsten walked into the bathroom and shut the door.

Seth paused and looked around the room. Everything was completely silent, except for the faint noise of his father breathing in his sleep. Seth glanced over at a picture standing up on Sandy's bedside table. It was a picture of Ryan and Seth smiling, all dressed up at Cotillion. A slight smile appeared across Seth's face. "Dad," he finally called out. "Wake up." 

Sandy grumbled as he turned over and opened his eyes. "Seth." 

"Get up, we're going to see Ryan soon," Seth said as he turned and left the room.

Sandy shot up immediately, as the previous night's events rushed back to him. He quickly got out of bed and went to his closet to grab some clothes.   
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Kaitlin stretched in her bed with a big smile on her face as the sun from outside shone in through the windows. She jumped out of bed, feeling good about the way things were shaping up. Kaitlin walked out of her room and down the hall. "Mom," she called out, but got no answer. She walked down the stairs and into the kitchen, looking forward to breakfast as her stomach grumbled. She smiled when she saw Neil standing in the kitchen, pouring himself a cup of coffee. "Morning Step-father."

Neil froze immediate when he heard Kaitlin's voice. Oh god, he thought to himself. They hadn't woken up Kaitlin last night. She was completely oblivious to everything. "Kaitlin," he looked up as she walked across the kitchen to grab some cereal.

"Where's my mom?" Kaitlin wondered aloud. 

Neil's cup of coffee slipped out of his hand and hit the ground, shattering everywhere. "Damnit," he quickly stepped out of the way to avoid the hot coffee that was slowly spreading on the floor.

"Whoa, relax buddy," Kaitlin laughed as she poured the milk into her cereal at the kitchen counter.

"Sorry," Neil looked down, trying to think of what to say to her. "Kaitlin, there's something I need to let you know. I understand that this probably shouldn't come from me, but it wouldn't be fair to have you wait any longer before telling you."

"Oh god, what did I do now?" Kaitlin crossed the kitchen and placed her bowl on the table.

"Kaitlin, this is a serious matter," Neil walked across the kitchen and stopped in front of the table. 

Kaitlin immediately knew by his tone that he was being completely serious. She looked up at him, anxious to hear what he was going to say. "What is it?"

"Marissa and Ryan were involved in a car accident last night," Neil looked down to the ground.

Kaitlin's heart started beating faster and faster as she thought of the different possible outcomes. "What? Are they okay?"

Neil closed his eyes for a moment before facing Kaitlin. "I'm so sorry. Your sister didn't make it."

The image of her sister's corpse flashed before her eyes before she pushed back her chair as fast as she could. "I have to go," Kaitlin turned around and ran out of the kitchen, down the hall, and out the front door.   
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Summer stared out at the vast ocean, her eyes wide open, as she leaned against the lifeguard tower that was formerly occupied by Marissa. Marissa used to come here to think about things, but it wasn't making Summer feel any better. Her eyes were wide open, and had been wide open all night. She hadn't even thought about sleeping. All she could think about was Marissa. Her best friend since they started school together. Dead. Gone. Forever. Summer just stared out at the ocean and recounted every single memory of Marissa, and she still couldn't comprehend the fact that Marissa was gone. It didn't make any sense to her. She couldn't be dead. She was perfectly fine only 12 hours ago as they swam and laughed together at the model home. It couldn't be real. It couldn't.   
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Ryan carefully opened his eyes, moaning from the pain that his body was feeling. He was uncomfortable, and unaware of his surroundings. Ryan sat up and looked around the room, noticing all the different items found in a hospital. Finally, he knew where he was. Now all he needed to do was figure out why. Ryan looked down and saw the bruises that went up his arms. Immediately, the feeling of being inside the car as it rolled down the hill came back to him. Marissa. Ryan tried hard to remember her condition when he last saw her, but he couldn't. The last thing he could remember was lying by the side of the road, Marissa wrapped in his arms. Was she okay? She had to be okay. He had to find out. Ryan threw the covers off him and got off the bed. His entire body slightly ached, but he could easily manage walking through the hospital. Ryan looked around the room and saw his jeans and shirt folded on the chair by the bed. He grabbed them, went into the bathroom, and quickly changed. The first thing he noticed was the blood on his jeans. Ryan walked out of the room and looked down the hospital hall. It was almost empty, except for one nurse walking away from him. Ryan walked the other direction and headed for the main lobby of the hospital. Finally, he found the place he was looking for, and walked up to the information desk. "Hi, I'm looking for a patient. Marissa Cooper."

The woman looked up with a smile, which quickly disappeared when she saw the blood on Ryan's clothes, and the bruises on his face. "Sir, are you okay?"

"Marissa Cooper," Ryan repeated. "What room is she in? I need to see her immediately."

"Sir, I really think I should call someone in to see you," the woman insisted. "You look like you've had a pretty rough night, and you should probably get checked out."

"Look," Ryan leaned closer to her. "I woke up this morning in a hospital bed, and the last image I can remember is lying at the side of the highway with my girlfriend after our car exploded. I just need to know if she's okay."

The woman paused, surprised by Ryan's forwardness, and nodded before looking down. Marissa Cooper, she typed into the computer. She scanned down the list of all the Coopers that popped up until she saw Marissa's name, and pushed enter. The clerk quickly read the file before pausing, afraid to look up at Ryan.

"What room is she in?" Ryan asked once again, getting impatient.

She bit her bottom lip before looking up at Ryan. "I'm so, so sorry, Sir. It appears that she had already passed away last night when she arrived."

Ryan stared at the woman as all the life in his face quickly faded away. "What do you mean?" he asked, although he knew exactly what she meant. Ryan turned away immediately before she had time to answer. All of the rage inside of him began to rise as he tried to block the information from his mind. Ryan fiercely headed for the exit of the hospital, just as Seth, Sandy and Kirsten were walking in.

"Ryan!" Kirsten ran forward. "Thank God you're okay."

Ryan walked right past her without even acknowledging her presence. He stormed right out the door, past Seth and Sandy. Kirsten turned around and looked at Sandy.

Seth looked at both of his parents. "Maybe he didn't see us." Seth turned around and ran out the hospital doors. "Ryan," he called out as he crossed the parking lot.

Ryan kept walking, faster and faster, completely ignoring the outside world.

"Ryan," Seth started to run until he finally caught up to Ryan. Seth put his hand on Ryan's shoulder to stop him, but Ryan turned around and shoved Seth as hard as he could. Seth stumbled back, almost falling to the ground. "What the hell, Ryan. Stop walking."

"Shut up Seth," Ryan said as he continued to walk.

"Talk to me," Seth called out as he ran up to Ryan. "We can get through this. We all need to help each other."

"I don't need your help," Ryan continued to cross the parking lot.

Seth turned around and saw his parents getting closer. "Ryan, please," he grabbed Ryan's shoulder once more.

Ryan spun around, grabbed Seth by the collar, and raised his fist. Seth noticed the fury in Ryan's eyes, and looked away, genuinely scared by what Ryan might do to him. Ryan saw the fear in Seth's eyes and pushed him away.

Sandy and Kirsten started running when they saw Seth hit the ground. Kirsten kneeled beside Seth when she reached him. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Seth said as he grabbed Sandy's hand, which helped pull him up.

All three of them turned and watched Ryan in the distance, getting smaller and smaller as he started to run.

Seth wiped the blood off his elbow and onto his jeans. "Should we go after him?"

"I don't know," Kirsten ran her fingers through her hair. "I wish we had gotten here before he woke up. I don't know what he's going to do."

"He looked dangerous," Sandy said as he pulled out his cell phone and started dialing a number. "We need to try and calm him down before he does something he's going to regret." Sandy waited a moment before getting Ryan's answering machine. "Ryan, it's me. I know you're upset, but give me a call when you get this. We're all upset, and it's best if we're all together."

"I can't believe this," Kirsten shook her head, as the reality of the situation was starting to sink in. "Oh my god," she closed her eyes and pictured Marissa. "I should call Julie. I can't even begin to imagine what she's going through," she pulled out her cell phone and dialed.   
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Julie pushed the empty bottle of vodka away from her as her cell phone started to vibrate on the bed-side table. She looked around the motel room that she hadn't gotten any sleep in, before reaching for her cell phone. She looked at the call display. Kirsten. Julie closed her eyes as she flipped open the phone and put it to her ear. 

Kirsten heard the click when Julie answered, but everything remained silent. Julie didn't speak. "Julie?" Kirsten hesitated. "Are you there?"

"Hi," Julie said faintly. 

"If you need to be alone let me know immediately," Kirsten said right away. "I just thought maybe you'd like to talk to someone."

Julie tried to contain her tears. She sniffed before responding. "Kiki, can you come to me?"

"Of course I can," Kirsten said in the hospital parking lot. "Are you at home?"

"The Mermaid Inn," Julie told her quickly. "Room 18."   
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Ryan slowed turned the Cohen's front door open. He walked into the house, looking around him, making sure no one was there. Ryan had one thing on his mind, and only one thing. He walked fiercely into the kitchen, and opened the drawer that held the cutlery. Ryan ruffled through the drawer until he found what he was looking for. Slowly, he pulled out a large butcher's knife and stared at the shining steel. After a moment, he slammed the drawer shut and stormed out of the house.   
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Kaitlin lit the joint in her hand before putting it to her lips and carefully inhaling. She took a long hit, and then another, and then another. Exhale. She looked down as she felt the cold ocean's water brush up against her flip flops every few seconds. Inhale, exhale. Kaitlin looked up at the pier above her and saw various people in the distance, walking, holding hands, eating ice cream, enjoying the California morning. If only she could be like them. Less than twelve hours ago, she was one of them. But the news she had just heard changed everything. It wasn't true. It couldn't be true. Inhale, exhale. Marissa couldn't be gone. Her big sister? The girl who she envied her entire life? No, it wasn't true. Marissa was going to be okay. Everything was going to be okay. Life doesn't change that fast. It's impossible. Neil must have been mistaken. Marissa was probably landing safely in Hawaii right now, about to meet up with their father. Kaitlin took another hit, desperately trying to calm herself down. It wasn't working. A million thoughts were running through her mind as she began to panic. It couldn't be true. If it was true, Julie would've woken her up last night. Right?   
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Summer picked up a handful of sand and then watched the grains slowly fall through the cracks between her fingers. Something about the sand felt calming, it kept her at ease. She picked up another handful, watched it fall. Her eyes hadn't been dry since the middle of the night. She was still trying to understand how it happened. She had no idea. One minute, she was saying goodbye to Marissa, wishing her the best of luck in the future. The next minute, she was standing in a hospital, crying in Seth's arms. How did it happen? Why did they crash? Suddenly, her thoughts were interrupted when she heard her cell phone ringing. Summer reached into her purse and pulled it out, looking at the call display. Seth. She paused before flipping open the phone. "Hi."

"Hey," Seth sat on his bed. "Are you okay?"

Summer remained silent as she watched the sand fall through her fingers. "Where are you?"

"I'm at home," he told her. "We just got back from the hospital." 

"How's Ryan?" Summer wondered.

Seth looked down, thinking about what happened in the parking lot. "Not good. He went off on me in the parking lot. We don't know where he is." 

"He probably needs to be alone," Summer stared out at the ocean.

"Yeah," Seth paused. "What about you? Do you need to be alone? Or do you want me to come see you."

Summer closed her eyes and thought about it for a second. At first, she thought she'd rather be alone, but after sitting alone on the beach all night and all morning, maybe it would be good to talk to someone. "Yeah, that would be good. I'm at the beach. Marissa's life-guard tower."

Seth went silent when he heard her location. He looked down and thought about Marissa. It was starting to sink in that she was really gone. "Okay. I'll be there soon."   
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Kirsten stopped in front of room 18. She took a deep breath before knocking. Although Julie was her closest friend, she knew this was going to be a tough conversation. As she closed her eyes, she raised her hand and knocked twice.

Julie looked up at the door when she heard the knocking. "Kiki?" she called out. 

Kirsten turned the door knob and walked in. "Oh my god," Kirsten quickly walked to Julie and opened her arms.

Julie stood up from the bed and hugged her friend tightly. "It's so good to see you," Julie said as she held onto Kirsten. After a couple seconds, Julie stopped trying to hide her emotions, and broke down in Kirsten's arms.

"I'm so sorry," Kirsten rubbed Julie's back as she cried into her shoulder. "I can't even imagine how you feel," Kirsten eyes filled with water as she thought about Marissa, and the pain that Julie was going through. 

"I just can't believe it," Julie pulled away and grabbed the bottle of vodka from the bedside table. "After everything we've been through, every fight we've had, every moment where I've felt like she loves me. It's all gone. It's all over," Julie raised the bottle to her lips and took a sip. Julie closed her eyes as the strong liquor went down her throat. When she was finished, she offered the bottle to Kirsten.

Kirsten gave Julie a look. "Uh, Julie…"

"Oh my god, Kirsten," Julie put the bottle down on the table. "I'm so sorry, I completely forgot. I'm so disoriented, I can't even think straight."

"That's completely understandable," Kirsten sat down on the bed.

"Well, I hope you don't mind that I'm drinking in front of you," Julie took another sip. "Because this bottle right here is pretty much the only thing that's keeping me from killing someone."

As Kirsten watched Julie speak, she tried to imagine what it would be like to lose Seth. It would be completely devastating to lose Ryan too, but it wouldn't be the same. Seth was completely hers, and had been his entire life. She couldn't even begin to comprehend how she would cope if Seth was ever taken from her.

"Oh god," Julie paused. "I just realized something."

"What," Kirsten looked up after getting lost in her own thoughts.

"Kaitlin," Julie looked horrified. "I haven't told Kaitlin. I completely forgot about her. I didn't even wake her up last night when we left for the hospital."   
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"Summer," Seth called out as he approached the famous life-guard tower.

Summer was sitting on the sand beside it. She turned her head when she heard her name and gave Seth a weak smile. "Hi."

He jogged towards her and sat down on the beach next to her. Seth didn't know how to act around her. He had never been in a situation like this. "How are you doing?"

"I don't know," Summer watched the sand fall through her fingers once more. "I can't even tell if it's already hit me or not. I feel numb inside, but I feel like something bigger is coming." 

Seth took her head in his. "I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine how much this is affecting you. Do you want to talk about it, or do you want some distractions?"

Summer picked up some more sand and sprinkled it in front of her as she looked up at the sun. "I don't want anything right now. Just silence. Can we just sit here, together, but alone?"

Seth looked into Summer's eyes and nodded before her eyes drifted back towards the sea. Seth watched Summer repetitively pick up the sand and slowly release it, and eventually he found himself doing the same.   
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Ryan walked down the dirty, familiar hallway that led to a half open door. The butcher's knife was safely wrapped in his fingers, and his clothing was still bloody. Ryan looked like a complete mess, like he had just walked out of a deadly bar fight. The fury inside of him was unlike anything he had ever experienced before. Ryan pushed open the door completely and barged into the trashy apartment. In his mind, he flashbacks to his previous experiences in this place. The fight that triggered his memories of Trey, and almost led to him killing someone. Unfortunately that day, he didn't end up killing Volchok. Now, he wished he had, and he was ready to finish it. Ryan gripped the knife harder as he walked around the place.

"Where the hell are you," he yelled out. "Come out you bastard, I'll kill you, I swear," the anger in Ryan grew stronger. He raised the knife and stabbed through the translucent red and blue sheets that hung from the ceiling. Ryan quickly moved through the place, picking things up and breaking them as he passed various objects. Volchok was nowhere to be found. The place looked rather empty. He had definitely come and gone since the accident. Volchok was fully aware what he had done, and now he was trying to get away. Ryan flung the butcher's knife across the room, causing a window to shatter. Ryan wasn't prepared to let him get away.


End file.
